I was barefoot in the kitchen making a sandwich the other day with the television playing in the background, when I was shocked to hear the news that TWO women are running for president. What a circus. I knew this would happen once we gave women the right to vote. This women’s stuff is out of control.

Someone once told me that “feminism” actually means social, political, and economic equality of the sexes, not that one gender is superior to the other. You know what I said to them? I said that can’t be right because that sounds logical and has words too big for my lady brain to understand. Obviously, “feminism” is just a pretty word for sexist. Stop man-hating, ladies! You’ll never get married this way!

Next thing you know these women will want equal pay and that’s just a slippery slope. Just because women do the same job and have the same qualifications doesn’t give them the right to equality! Sure women earn 57% of college degrees today and work just as hard at the same jobs….but women have totally natural, totally gross stuff happen to them like periods, pregnancy, and breastfeeding. Accommodating for females and their biological things at work is just tedious, and really unnecessary, amirite?!

These women complain all the time about objectification and stuff. Women just need to get comfortable with other people, like complete strangers, commenting on their appearance and telling them what to do. I mean, I appreciate when a stranger has the care and concern to have a strong opinion on how I should I look and what I should do with my body. I just haaaate using my brain. Should I breathe right now or not? I await your command stranger!

So now I hear about women wanting to be CEOs. More on your plate, ladies? I mean, historically women have done things like work, take care of the kids, grocery shop, cook, clean, do laundry, delegate chores, drive the kids to school, and who knows what else. And now CEO? Do you even have those multitasking skills that job would require?

Anyway, I’m confused why Wharton Journal would want an issue where WWIB takes over. It’s like they think that Wharton is full of future leaders who could take it all to heart and make impactful changes one day to improve things for everyone, female and male. Crazy talk.